Under and Alone

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Random House Audio | Oct 25, 2005 | 360 Minutes | ISBN 9780739325032

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    Fawcett | Mar 28, 2006 | 272 Pages | 4-3/16 x 6-7/8 | ISBN 9780345487520

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    Ballantine Books | Jun 26, 2007 | 288 Pages | 5-3/16 x 8 | ISBN 9780812969528

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    Random House | Apr 05, 2005 | ISBN 9781588364401

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    Random House Audio | Oct 25, 2005 | 360 Minutes | ISBN 9780739325032

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    Random House Audio | Dec 05, 2006 | 496 Minutes | ISBN 9781415935453

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Praise

Advance praise for Under and Alone

“Under and Alone is the dangerous and fascinating true story of an undercover ATF agent and the psychological price he was made to pay for his courageous work.”
Joseph Wambaugh, bestselling author of The Onion Field

“A riveting story of a one-of-a-kind officer that takes you to the deepest and most dangerous part of undercover work. Highly recommended.”
Joseph Pistone, author of Donnie Brasco: My Undercover Life in the Mafia

“Top-shelf adventure . . . packed with great intensity . . . a dark and twisted world, fully realized. Don’t be surprised if it runs to bestsellerdom.”
Kirkus Reviews


From the Hardcover edition.

Author Q&A

A Conversation with William Queen


1) When you were undercover with the Mongols, did you ever stop ‘playing the role’ and start to identify with the group? How was your sense-of-self challenged?

I found myself becoming the part I was playing from time to time. Especially after I got used to the idea that I could fit in with such a lawless and twisted group of people without actually getting myself killed. The more time I spent with them the more what we think of as ‘normal’ social events I incurred, along with what you and I think of as family time. I even found myself believing that they were, for the most part, just like you and me. Quite often Mongols would treat me like a real brother even to the point that I knew they would put their lives on the line for me. I compared this to my brothers in arms at ATF and realized very few of them who would put their lives on the line for me. I became confused, sometimes quite often. This really came to a head with the death of my mother. Not a single ATF employee expressed condolences about my losing her. But Mongol after Mongol told me that they were sorry about my Mom and that they loved me. I felt genuinely guilty for what I was doing. And I realized how much of a number I was to ATF. I truly wanted to be a Mongol at that point. I even thought about telling them the truth and backing out of the undercover operation. I was saved from my confusion by the Mongols propensity for crime and violence. Just when I thought I knew what was really right with the Mongols, they would do something stupid like murder someone or rape some female. I was instantly brought to reality again. But, it would still weigh on me as you might imagine.


2) Why is being a 1%er a source of pride for OMG members? Do they choose this path because they thrive on lawlessness, or are they drifters looking to be taken in by a community?

OMGs (outlaw motorcycle gangs) don’t want to be part of the norm, the mainstream. They don’t want to conform and don’t care for “The System”. For the most part they don’t care what the community or society thinks or demands. They take pride in the “Outlaw” part of the 1%er. Laws are made for people like you and me. 1%ers have their own code they live by. Not everyone can be an outlaw. Just like other elite groups, this is what they pride themselves in. The way they see it, they are a unique and elite group of people. So if you can make it (with them), you are somebody.

For the most part 1%ers come from the criminal side of our society. They are already outside the mainstream and quite often find themselves in some type of criminal gang. OMGs are like the ultimate gang. They have a mystique about them. A kind of cream of the criminal crop. They portray power as a group and as individuals. Fear is quite often confused with respect in this world and the less successful people looking for success quite often see themselves with power if they could be a part of such organizations. OMGs aren’t looking for intelligent or educated people. They are looking for the birds of a feather. Once inside, there is a real sense of security. You don’t fight a Mongol, you fight the Mongols. Mongol brothers don’t care whether you cheat your neighbor or sell drugs. They don’t care whether you take a bath or drink too much. They are going to accept you anyway. They’ll stand together when other organizations fall apart.


3) What kind of presence do outlaw motorcycle gangs have today. Are they as large and organized still as they were when you were undercover?

OMGs are world-wide. They are bigger today then when I rode. They are as organized and as dangerous as ever.


4) Do you still ride?

I do still ride. I own a 2000 Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide. I’ll ride till I can’t ride any more.


From the Hardcover edition.

 

A Conversation with William Queen


1) When you were undercover with the Mongols, did you ever stop ‘playing the role’ and start to identify with the group? How was your sense-of-self challenged?

I found myself becoming the part I was playing from time to time. Especially after I got used to the idea that I could fit in with such a lawless and twisted group of people without actually getting myself killed. The more time I spent with them the more what we think of as ‘normal’ social events I incurred, along with what you and I think of as family time. I even found myself believing that they were, for the most part, just like you and me. Quite often Mongols would treat me like a real brother even to the point that I knew they would put their lives on the line for me. I compared this to my brothers in arms at ATF and realized very few of them who would put their lives on the line for me. I became confused, sometimes quite often. This really came to a head with the death of my mother. Not a single ATF employee expressed condolences about my losing her. But Mongol after Mongol told me that they were sorry about my Mom and that they loved me. I felt genuinely guilty for what I was doing. And I realized how much of a number I was to ATF. I truly wanted to be a Mongol at that point. I even thought about telling them the truth and backing out of the undercover operation. I was saved from my confusion by the Mongols propensity for crime and violence. Just when I thought I knew what was really right with the Mongols, they would do something stupid like murder someone or rape some female. I was instantly brought to reality again. But, it would still weigh on me as you might imagine.


2) Why is being a 1%er a source of pride for OMG members? Do they choose this path because they thrive on lawlessness, or are they drifters looking to be taken in by a community?

OMGs (outlaw motorcycle gangs) don’t want to be part of the norm, the mainstream. They don’t want to conform and don’t care for “The System”. For the most part they don’t care what the community or society thinks or demands. They take pride in the “Outlaw” part of the 1%er. Laws are made for people like you and me. 1%ers have their own code they live by. Not everyone can be an outlaw. Just like other elite groups, this is what they pride themselves in. The way they see it, they are a unique and elite group of people. So if you can make it (with them), you are somebody.

For the most part 1%ers come from the criminal side of our society. They are already outside the mainstream and quite often find themselves in some type of criminal gang. OMGs are like the ultimate gang. They have a mystique about them. A kind of cream of the criminal crop. They portray power as a group and as individuals. Fear is quite often confused with respect in this world and the less successful people looking for success quite often see themselves with power if they could be a part of such organizations. OMGs aren’t looking for intelligent or educated people. They are looking for the birds of a feather. Once inside, there is a real sense of security. You don’t fight a Mongol, you fight the Mongols. Mongol brothers don’t care whether you cheat your neighbor or sell drugs. They don’t care whether you take a bath or drink too much. They are going to accept you anyway. They’ll stand together when other organizations fall apart.


3) What kind of presence do outlaw motorcycle gangs have today. Are they as large and organized still as they were when you were undercover?

OMGs are world-wide. They are bigger today then when I rode. They are as organized and as dangerous as ever.


4) Do you still ride?

I do still ride. I own a 2000 Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide. I’ll ride till I can’t ride any more.


From the Hardcover edition.

 

A Conversation with William Queen


1) When you were undercover with the Mongols, did you ever stop ‘playing the role’ and start to identify with the group? How was your sense-of-self challenged?

I found myself becoming the part I was playing from time to time. Especially after I got used to the idea that I could fit in with such a lawless and twisted group of people without actually getting myself killed. The more time I spent with them the more what we think of as ‘normal’ social events I incurred, along with what you and I think of as family time. I even found myself believing that they were, for the most part, just like you and me. Quite often Mongols would treat me like a real brother even to the point that I knew they would put their lives on the line for me. I compared this to my brothers in arms at ATF and realized very few of them who would put their lives on the line for me. I became confused, sometimes quite often. This really came to a head with the death of my mother. Not a single ATF employee expressed condolences about my losing her. But Mongol after Mongol told me that they were sorry about my Mom and that they loved me. I felt genuinely guilty for what I was doing. And I realized how much of a number I was to ATF. I truly wanted to be a Mongol at that point. I even thought about telling them the truth and backing out of the undercover operation. I was saved from my confusion by the Mongols propensity for crime and violence. Just when I thought I knew what was really right with the Mongols, they would do something stupid like murder someone or rape some female. I was instantly brought to reality again. But, it would still weigh on me as you might imagine.


2) Why is being a 1%er a source of pride for OMG members? Do they choose this path because they thrive on lawlessness, or are they drifters looking to be taken in by a community?

OMGs (outlaw motorcycle gangs) don’t want to be part of the norm, the mainstream. They don’t want to conform and don’t care for “The System”. For the most part they don’t care what the community or society thinks or demands. They take pride in the “Outlaw” part of the 1%er. Laws are made for people like you and me. 1%ers have their own code they live by. Not everyone can be an outlaw. Just like other elite groups, this is what they pride themselves in. The way they see it, they are a unique and elite group of people. So if you can make it (with them), you are somebody.

For the most part 1%ers come from the criminal side of our society. They are already outside the mainstream and quite often find themselves in some type of criminal gang. OMGs are like the ultimate gang. They have a mystique about them. A kind of cream of the criminal crop. They portray power as a group and as individuals. Fear is quite often confused with respect in this world and the less successful people looking for success quite often see themselves with power if they could be a part of such organizations. OMGs aren’t looking for intelligent or educated people. They are looking for the birds of a feather. Once inside, there is a real sense of security. You don’t fight a Mongol, you fight the Mongols. Mongol brothers don’t care whether you cheat your neighbor or sell drugs. They don’t care whether you take a bath or drink too much. They are going to accept you anyway. They’ll stand together when other organizations fall apart.


3) What kind of presence do outlaw motorcycle gangs have today. Are they as large and organized still as they were when you were undercover?

OMGs are world-wide. They are bigger today then when I rode. They are as organized and as dangerous as ever.


4) Do you still ride?

I do still ride. I own a 2000 Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide. I’ll ride till I can’t ride any more.


From the Hardcover edition.

 

A Conversation with William Queen


1) When you were undercover with the Mongols, did you ever stop ‘playing the role’ and start to identify with the group? How was your sense-of-self challenged?

I found myself becoming the part I was playing from time to time. Especially after I got used to the idea that I could fit in with such a lawless and twisted group of people without actually getting myself killed. The more time I spent with them the more what we think of as ‘normal’ social events I incurred, along with what you and I think of as family time. I even found myself believing that they were, for the most part, just like you and me. Quite often Mongols would treat me like a real brother even to the point that I knew they would put their lives on the line for me. I compared this to my brothers in arms at ATF and realized very few of them who would put their lives on the line for me. I became confused, sometimes quite often. This really came to a head with the death of my mother. Not a single ATF employee expressed condolences about my losing her. But Mongol after Mongol told me that they were sorry about my Mom and that they loved me. I felt genuinely guilty for what I was doing. And I realized how much of a number I was to ATF. I truly wanted to be a Mongol at that point. I even thought about telling them the truth and backing out of the undercover operation. I was saved from my confusion by the Mongols propensity for crime and violence. Just when I thought I knew what was really right with the Mongols, they would do something stupid like murder someone or rape some female. I was instantly brought to reality again. But, it would still weigh on me as you might imagine.


2) Why is being a 1%er a source of pride for OMG members? Do they choose this path because they thrive on lawlessness, or are they drifters looking to be taken in by a community?

OMGs (outlaw motorcycle gangs) don’t want to be part of the norm, the mainstream. They don’t want to conform and don’t care for “The System”. For the most part they don’t care what the community or society thinks or demands. They take pride in the “Outlaw” part of the 1%er. Laws are made for people like you and me. 1%ers have their own code they live by. Not everyone can be an outlaw. Just like other elite groups, this is what they pride themselves in. The way they see it, they are a unique and elite group of people. So if you can make it (with them), you are somebody.

For the most part 1%ers come from the criminal side of our society. They are already outside the mainstream and quite often find themselves in some type of criminal gang. OMGs are like the ultimate gang. They have a mystique about them. A kind of cream of the criminal crop. They portray power as a group and as individuals. Fear is quite often confused with respect in this world and the less successful people looking for success quite often see themselves with power if they could be a part of such organizations. OMGs aren’t looking for intelligent or educated people. They are looking for the birds of a feather. Once inside, there is a real sense of security. You don’t fight a Mongol, you fight the Mongols. Mongol brothers don’t care whether you cheat your neighbor or sell drugs. They don’t care whether you take a bath or drink too much. They are going to accept you anyway. They’ll stand together when other organizations fall apart.


3) What kind of presence do outlaw motorcycle gangs have today. Are they as large and organized still as they were when you were undercover?

OMGs are world-wide. They are bigger today then when I rode. They are as organized and as dangerous as ever.


4) Do you still ride?

I do still ride. I own a 2000 Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide. I’ll ride till I can’t ride any more.


From the Hardcover edition.

 

A Conversation with William Queen


1) When you were undercover with the Mongols, did you ever stop ‘playing the role’ and start to identify with the group? How was your sense-of-self challenged?

I found myself becoming the part I was playing from time to time. Especially after I got used to the idea that I could fit in with such a lawless and twisted group of people without actually getting myself killed. The more time I spent with them the more what we think of as ‘normal’ social events I incurred, along with what you and I think of as family time. I even found myself believing that they were, for the most part, just like you and me. Quite often Mongols would treat me like a real brother even to the point that I knew they would put their lives on the line for me. I compared this to my brothers in arms at ATF and realized very few of them who would put their lives on the line for me. I became confused, sometimes quite often. This really came to a head with the death of my mother. Not a single ATF employee expressed condolences about my losing her. But Mongol after Mongol told me that they were sorry about my Mom and that they loved me. I felt genuinely guilty for what I was doing. And I realized how much of a number I was to ATF. I truly wanted to be a Mongol at that point. I even thought about telling them the truth and backing out of the undercover operation. I was saved from my confusion by the Mongols propensity for crime and violence. Just when I thought I knew what was really right with the Mongols, they would do something stupid like murder someone or rape some female. I was instantly brought to reality again. But, it would still weigh on me as you might imagine.


2) Why is being a 1%er a source of pride for OMG members? Do they choose this path because they thrive on lawlessness, or are they drifters looking to be taken in by a community?

OMGs (outlaw motorcycle gangs) don’t want to be part of the norm, the mainstream. They don’t want to conform and don’t care for “The System”. For the most part they don’t care what the community or society thinks or demands. They take pride in the “Outlaw” part of the 1%er. Laws are made for people like you and me. 1%ers have their own code they live by. Not everyone can be an outlaw. Just like other elite groups, this is what they pride themselves in. The way they see it, they are a unique and elite group of people. So if you can make it (with them), you are somebody.

For the most part 1%ers come from the criminal side of our society. They are already outside the mainstream and quite often find themselves in some type of criminal gang. OMGs are like the ultimate gang. They have a mystique about them. A kind of cream of the criminal crop. They portray power as a group and as individuals. Fear is quite often confused with respect in this world and the less successful people looking for success quite often see themselves with power if they could be a part of such organizations. OMGs aren’t looking for intelligent or educated people. They are looking for the birds of a feather. Once inside, there is a real sense of security. You don’t fight a Mongol, you fight the Mongols. Mongol brothers don’t care whether you cheat your neighbor or sell drugs. They don’t care whether you take a bath or drink too much. They are going to accept you anyway. They’ll stand together when other organizations fall apart.


3) What kind of presence do outlaw motorcycle gangs have today. Are they as large and organized still as they were when you were undercover?

OMGs are world-wide. They are bigger today then when I rode. They are as organized and as dangerous as ever.


4) Do you still ride?

I do still ride. I own a 2000 Harley Davidson Dyna Wide Glide. I’ll ride till I can’t ride any more.


From the Hardcover edition.

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