“Jan Clausen’s memoir is more relevant now than ever. Apples & Oranges is at once a riveting personal narrative about the sacrifices we make for love, and an intellectual examination of the ways that intimacy, identity, and community entangle in our lives and selves. It is a book that shows us with grace and stirring honesty how severing an attachment—to our lovers, to our self-conceptions—can collapse everything we thought permanent, and reveal what truly is.” —Melissa Febos, author of Whip Smart and Abandon Me