Not the Girl you Marry by Andie J. Christopher
Questions for Discussion
1. At the beginning of the book, Hannah has given up all hope of meeting someone and she isn’t looking for love. Some people say that “you always find love when you stop looking.” Do you think that’s true? What role does hope play in finding love? What role does luck play in finding love?
2. Hannah is fiercely protective of her female friends, particularly Sasha. Do you think that she derives a sense of worthiness from her female friendships?How so?
3. Did it strike you that Hannah identified herself as bi-racial rather than black? Do you think that played into the failure of her relationship with Noah? How do you think her racial identity played into the development of her relationship with Jack?
4. Jack’s dad gives Michael and Jack a very brief— but frank— sex talk. Did the content of that talk surprise you? Did it subvert the notion of toxic masculinity? How does Sean Nolan’s attitude toward sex influence Jack?
5. Who would you cast to play Hannah and Jack in a movie version of the book?
6. Jack perceives himself as the ideal boyfriend at the be-ginning of the book because he’s surrendered his needs for the needs of his partners in the past. Is Jack the per-fect boyfriend? Or is his perfection keeping him from making a genuine, lasting connection?
7. Jack has close, intimate friendships with his male friends— particularly Father Patrick. How do you think those relationships shape him as a person and affect how he approaches his burgeoning relationship with Hannah?
8. How did you feel about Noah and Hannah’s relation-ship as exes? Why do you think they started dating in the first place? How do you feel about where they ended up?