Essays
My Unusual & Serendipitous Road To Publishing
On embracing the journey of self-discovery and rediscovering the joy of reading.
Nadia/Nads is a non-binary, British American Gemini who lives in the woods of New York and has ADHD. They also have a BSc and MPH! They are the marketing assistant for Vintage and a part-time model. They are particularly drawn to fantasy worlds, queer representation, and Black narratives across all media — bonus points if all three! Usually, they are hyper-fixating on some fictional character or TV show. Recent interests include Interview with the Vampire, Arcane, and 9-1-1. At the time of writing, the #buddiecanon derangement is inescapable and chokehold-like. The last book they read and fell in love with was Martyr! By Kaveh Akbar. You can find them on Instagram, TikTok, & YouTube.
I never even considered that I could work in publishing, despite my favorite places being libraries, bookstores, or anywhere I can curl up (or sprawl out, vibes permitting) with a book, and a core facet of my identity being my love and admiration for storytelling. It just never crossed my mind. In fact, reading became a hobby that fell to the wayside for many years throughout school. I threw myself into my studies and followed the lead of my scientific sensibilities instead, all the way through to completing my Master’s in Public Health this past October.
Somewhere along the way, I drifted from the familiar comfort of reading. Academic pressures kicked in, I stopped being able to pass through the social scrutiny machine unscathed, and I desperately wanted to be cool — understandably. To a 15-year-old me, there was something distinctly uncool about being the kid who even the teachers mocked for spending all their time in the library, who would win awards for most books checked out year after year, and who you could count on to be nose-deep in a book about magic, or dragons, or forbidden love in the thrumming hallways of British secondary school. Now, come to think of it, I sound like the type of protagonist I would love to read about. At the time, though, I thought I needed to grow up.
Fast forward to my final year of university, a time in my life when my mental health was at its lowest, and I didn’t know how to hold myself through it. The aching metamorphosis of coming of age, of being thrust out into the world, caused the fog to lift; I realized I had not read a book for pleasure, cover to cover, in about five years. It was one of the first times I remember being truly gobsmacked by the breakneck passage of time and dizzied by the perspective it gave me. Five years?! Reading was my first love; I needed to get her back.
I realized that I hadn’t immersed myself in Black literature. Kindred quickly became my favorite book, and Octavia Butler, my favorite author. I decided to read more Black literature: Beloved by Toni Morrison, Giovanni’s Room by James Baldwin, I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelou, and All About Love by bell hooks. I fell in love with the vast expanse of Black futures and the beautiful, complicated tapestry of Black history. Finding them on the page felt like finding myself. I started posting on BookTok, and slowly, I found my feet. My platform still isn’t the biggest, but I love my community over there – and it’s opened me up to many firsts, from moderating my very first reading retreat, to my first kind-of-viral video about the torture scene in the 1984 Audible dramatization. I fully embraced being a Freak on Main. Eventually, it led me to consider a career in publishing.
You could certainly call my journey to publishing untraditional. I didn’t have any clean-cut publishing or marketing experience when I applied for my role. I always joke that I was “the personality hire”, but there’s an element of truth to it. I applied with a pocketful of dreams and a lot of passion for who I am and who shaped me. I credited Baldwin and Morrison, my greats, for guiding me to the opportunity to even interview for the role. In short, I showed up, sure.
On the day before my 26th birthday, I received my job offer. This cannot be overstated: my first big-boy job! In a wildly unpredictable and out-of-character move, probably fueled by adrenaline, I posted the following on LinkedIn:
I could cry! In May, I’ll be turning 27 and celebrating nearly one year at Vintage. In that time, I’ve had the privilege of working on James Baldwin’s centenary campaign (yes, I was the one building the Baldwin boxes from my high tower, rubbing my hands together gleefully), writing copy for displays in LinkNYC booths all around NYC… and celebrating his incredible legacy with his family. I’ve organized book clubs and sent out Toni Morrison books to teachers and communities who are disenfranchised and threatened with intellectual censorship. I’ve interviewed incredibly talented authors who are writing crucial, joyous trans love stories, and much more.
Every version of myself is folded into who I am today and where I’m heading, and I’m so glad I realized reading is cool again.
My Book Recommendations & Staff Picks:
