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Assume the Worst by Carl Hiaasen

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Assume the Worst

The Graduation Speech You’ll Never Hear

The Graduation Speech You’ll Never Hear

The Graduation Speech You’ll Never Hear

By Carl Hiaasen
Illustrated by Roz Chast

By Carl Hiaasen
Illustrated by Roz Chast

By Carl Hiaasen
Illustrated by Roz Chast

By Carl Hiaasen
Illustrated by Roz Chast

By Carl Hiaasen
Read by Carl Hiaasen

By Carl Hiaasen
Read by Carl Hiaasen

Category: Humor | Philosophy

Category: Humor | Philosophy

Category: Humor | Philosophy | Audiobooks

Hardcover $15.95

Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages

Ebook $8.99

Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages

Audiobook Download $7.50

Apr 10, 2018 | 15 Minutes

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    Assume the Worst by Carl Hiaasen
    Hardcover
    Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages
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    • Hardcover $15.95

      Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages

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    • Ebook $8.99

      Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages

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    About Assume the Worst

    This is Oh, the Places You’ll Never Go–the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate’s future. And what he or she can or can’t do about it.

    “This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That’s not what you need. You need a warning.”
         So begins Carl Hiaasen’s attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: Nobody.
         And who better to illustrate–and with those illustrations, expand upon and cement Hiaasen’s cynical point of view–than Roz Chast, best-selling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner? The answer again is easy: Nobody.
         Following the format of Anna Quindlen’s commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders’s commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), the collaboration of Hiaasen and Chast might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but.
         This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it’s also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

    About Assume the Worst

    This is Oh, the Places You’ll Never Go–the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate’s future. And what he or she can or can’t do about it.

    “This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That’s not what you need. You need a warning.”
         So begins Carl Hiaasen’s attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: Nobody.
         And who better to illustrate–and with those illustrations, expand upon and cement Hiaasen’s cynical point of view–than Roz Chast, best-selling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner? The answer again is easy: Nobody.
         Following the format of Anna Quindlen’s commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders’s commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), the collaboration of Hiaasen and Chast might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but.
         This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it’s also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

    About Assume the Worst

    This is Oh, the Places You’ll Never Go–the ultimate hilarious, cynical, but absolutely realistic view of a college graduate’s future. And what he or she can or can’t do about it.

    “This commencement address will never be given, because graduation speakers are supposed to offer encouragement and inspiration. That’s not what you need. You need a warning.”
         So begins Carl Hiaasen’s attempt to prepare young men and women for their future. And who better to warn them about their precarious paths forward than Carl Hiaasen? The answer, after reading Assume the Worst, is: Nobody.
         And who better to illustrate–and with those illustrations, expand upon and cement Hiaasen’s cynical point of view–than Roz Chast, best-selling author/illustrator and National Book Award winner? The answer again is easy: Nobody.
         Following the format of Anna Quindlen’s commencement address (Being Perfect) and George Saunders’s commencement address (Congratulations, by the way), the collaboration of Hiaasen and Chast might look typical from the outside, but inside it is anything but.
         This book is bound to be a classic, sold year after year come graduation time. Although it’s also a good gift for anyone starting a job, getting married, or recently released from prison. Because it is not just funny. It is, in its own Hiaasen way, extremely wise and even hopeful. Well, it might not be full of hope, but there are certainly enough slivers of the stuff in there to more than keep us all going.

    Read An Excerpt

    Also by Carl Hiaasen

    Squirm
    Razor Girl
    Tourist Season
    Skinny Dip
    Skink--No Surrender
    See all books by Carl Hiaasen

    Also by Carl Hiaasen

    Squirm
    Razor Girl
    Tourist Season
    Skinny Dip
    Skink--No Surrender
    See all books by Carl Hiaasen

    Also by Carl Hiaasen

    Squirm
    Razor Girl
    Tourist Season
    Skinny Dip
    Skink--No Surrender
    See all books by Carl Hiaasen

    About Carl Hiaasen

    CARL HIAASEN was born and raised in Florida. He is the author of thirteen previous novels, including the best sellers Razor Girl, Bad Monkey, Star Island, Nature Girl, Skinny Dip, Sick Puppy, and Lucky You, and five best-selling children’s books, Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp, and Skink. His most recent… More about Carl Hiaasen

    About Carl Hiaasen

    CARL HIAASEN was born and raised in Florida. He is the author of thirteen previous novels, including the best sellers Razor Girl, Bad Monkey, Star Island, Nature Girl, Skinny Dip, Sick Puppy, and Lucky You, and five best-selling children’s books, Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp, and Skink. His most recent… More about Carl Hiaasen

    About Carl Hiaasen

    CARL HIAASEN was born and raised in Florida. He is the author of thirteen previous novels, including the best sellers Razor Girl, Bad Monkey, Star Island, Nature Girl, Skinny Dip, Sick Puppy, and Lucky You, and five best-selling children’s books, Hoot, Flush, Scat, Chomp, and Skink. His most recent… More about Carl Hiaasen

    Product Details

    Category: Humor | Philosophy

    Hardcover | $15.95
    Published by Knopf
    Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages | 4-3/4 x 6-7/8 | ISBN 9780525655015

    Category: Humor | Philosophy

    Ebook | $8.99
    Published by Knopf
    Apr 10, 2018 | 64 Pages | ISBN 9780525655022

    Category: Humor | Philosophy | Audiobooks

    Audiobook Download | $7.50
    Published by Random House Audio
    Apr 10, 2018 | 15 Minutes | ISBN 9780525643128

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    Praise

    “Pointed and humorous; a good gift for the neighbor’s kid’s graduation.”
    —Kirkus Reviews

    “…you will be tempted to carry it around forever in your back pocket as a quick reference guide for life. Think of this book as the pocket edition of the Dead Sea Scrolls.”
    —Denver Post

    “A book that everyone who’s changing course must read.”
    —The Florida Times-Union

    “…young people graduating from high school or college this year can count themselves lucky if someone gives them this book as a gift.”
    —Tampa Bay Times

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