God I Feel Modern Tonight

Poems of heartbreak and sex, self-care and self-critique, urban adventures and love on the road from the millennial queen and comedy sensation.

In these short, captivating lyrics, Catherine Cohen, the one-woman stand-up chanteuse who electrified the downtown NYC comedy scene in her white go-go boots, and who has been posting poignant, unfiltered poems on social media since before Instagram was a thing, details her life on the prowl with her beaded bag; she ponders guys who call you “dude” after sex, true love during the pandemic, and English-major dreams. “I wish I were smart instead of on my phone,” Cat Cohen confides; “heartbreak, / when it comes, and it will come / is always new.” A Dorothy Parker for our time, a Starbucks philosophe with no primary-care doctor, she’s a welcome new breed of everywoman–a larger-than-life best friend, who will say all the outrageous things we think but never say out loud ourselves.

in L.A. we got naked and swam in the ocean
we ate cured meats and carrots
& sat in the back of a red pickup truck
like we were in a film where two old friends fight
& wrestle their way into a hug
heave-sobbing as the dust settles
I want to be famous for being the first person
who never feels bad again