To Those Who Have Confused You to Be a Person

Praise

“A meticulous accounting of the effects of online harassment, the way it can upend women’s careers, their health and their minds.”—The Washington Post

“An astonishing, brilliant, and timely book, Dastagir’s To Those Who Have Confused You to Be a Person sheds more light on misogynistic online culture and what women face today as a result than any other book I have read. A courageous, moving, and vital piece of reporting that I want to press into the hands of every person with an Internet connection.”—Kate Manne, author of Unshrinking

“Alia Dastagir has written an urgent and necessary argument for a more humane internet and, as a result, a better world. Weaving together profiles of women who have become the center of targeted harassment campaigns, To Those Who Have Confused You to Be a Person untangles the violence of internet abuse and shows how it silences the voices we need to hear the most. This book is both a manual and a manifesto for bringing about a better way to exist online. Dastagir has written a must-read for our digital age.”—Lyz Lenz, New York Times bestselling author of This American Ex-Wife

“Online harassment is not only a common precursor to offline violence; it is violence. Alia explores how the Internet has heightened vulnerabilities and created new ways for abusers to tell lies, target, and terrorize. Women are told to ignore the trolls and stalkers that live on our screens who deny us safety even within our own homes, but Alia highlights the necessity of allowing survivors to feel pain and anger. To Those Who Have Confused You to Be a Person marries scientific research and lyrical writing to remind readers that our bodies react to violence in different ways and that resisting patriarchal and white supremacist forces is never easy, but the fight will always be worth it.”—Carrie Goldberg, author of Nobody’s Victim

“Alia Dastagir has given us an important book that will help us make sense of the very real, material violence of the modern Internet and what we should do about it. She is a voice that the public and scholars can rely upon to know what to do with violence against women on the web, as her work makes immediate and urgent the issues that policymakers and companies can no longer ignore. This beautifully written book gives us the courage to make sense of the concerns we all hold about the harms of the Internet and is a clarion call that our humanity is valuable and worth caring deeply about when it comes to how we engage with technology on an everyday basis.”—Safiya Umoja Noble, author of Algorithms of Oppression: How Search Engines Reinforce Racism

“You are lucky to be holding this book. Lucky because it will make you rethink violence and language and the ways the two create each other. It will make you rethink misogyny and the way it’s not just about women but also white supremacy and structural oppression. But more than this, you are lucky because Alia Dastagir has written a way through these seemingly entrenched systems—by writing with immense care about those who fight back.”—Cris Beam, author of I Feel You and To the End of June