Forever, After

After losing her fiancé the night before her wedding, Nicole Paultre Bell speaks out in FINDING POWER — a millennial Black woman survivor’s 20-year journey to unlocking genuine strength and protecting her peace in a world that aims to disempower

When Nicole Paultre Bell’s fiancé Sean Bell was gunned down by NYPD in the wee morning hours of their wedding day, Nicole became an unwitting part of a long tradition and an unwelcomed club—survivors of police violence against Black people in America. As a 22-year-old mother of two baby girls widowed before she was officially wed, Nicole’s fight for justice happened in a time before mass social justice movements and viral social media campaigns calling for police accountability. Yet, Sean’s killing made national news and ultimately, three officers were indicted on charges ranging from first degree manslaughter to reckless engagement.

And then, they were all acquitted.

For a long time, Nicole’s struggle to harness her grief and anger was maddening and lonely. Alas, Nicole Paultre Bell is a true Queens girl—a fighter. FINDING POWER is her emotional story of life after loss and of fighting the power (systems, haters and the demon of self-doubt) for the most authentic win.