They recommend: Honesty (usually), playing fair, shutting up (sometimes), speaking up (other times), respecting that voice in your head that says “You’re doing WHAT?”, making compromises, knowing when to cut bait, good sex, giving yourself a break, being needlessly generous, and periodically leaving your apartment.
They don’t recommend: Pretending to like what you don’t like, treating winking and giggling like a Get Out Of Jail Free card, testing people, stubbornness, martyrdom, talking everything to death, and convincing yourself that you’re desperate.
Author
Evan Marc Katz
Evan Marc Katz is the founder of E-Cyrano, a premier online dating consultant service now teamed up with JDate. He has been interviewed on Fox, CNN, NPR, and appeared in USA Today.
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Linda Holmes
Linda Holmes is a novelist, a pop culture correspondent for NPR, and one of the hosts of the popular podcast Pop Culture Happy Hour, which has held sold-out live shows in New York, Los Angeles, Washington, D.C., and elsewhere. She appears regularly on NPR radio shows including Morning Edition, All Things Considered, and Weekend Edition. Before NPR, she wrote for New York magazine online and for TV Guide, as well as for the groundbreaking website Television Without Pity. Her first novel, Evvie Drake Starts Over, was a New York Times bestseller. In her free time, she watches far too many romantic comedies, bakes bread, plays with her wonderful dog, and tries to keep various plants thriving.
Learn More about Linda Holmes